Poem of the Month: By Alan Boarder

You have a wonderful sense of Humor

You have a wonderful sense of humor

But you laugh through a mouth that has no lips.

Your voice is a croak.

You have three bosoms and only one leg.

I managed to have sex with you

But you stood up afterwards and your bum fell off.

You exist only in my dreams

Where I attempt to construct you with only partial success

One night I will get you right

You will have a head, two arms, a lovely body and legs, a tail

(No I don’t want you to have a tail.)

A voice like a angel, shining eyes, flesh soft and pink -----

And then I ‘ll drag you out of my dream

Hot and screaming

I ‘ll wake up and you will be lying there breathing softly

And take you warm hand and lead you out in into the garden

Put a blue dress on you

Have a cup of tea

And I’ll be alone no more.

Alan Boarder is a successful artist and poet hailing from Whitchurch on Thames, South Oxfordshire. He began his career in 1967, when he painted his now famous Dog with an Erection, a now iconic image which has been displayed in the worlds leading galleries, winning critical acclaim from the art worlds most eminent professors. 

This previously forgotten work was written by Boarder in 2005. No doubt it will be another fantastic success from one of the art worlds most beloved sons.